Borderline Syndrome - Information for Relatives
introduction
Borderline syndrome is a number of different symptoms that can be grouped together as a personality disorder of the borderline type. The patients are often very impulsive and mostly have Disturbances in interpersonal contacts. Additionally vary the Mood as well as that Self-image often strong. It is therefore difficult not only for the patient but also for the relatives to come to terms with a borderline syndrome. That is why it is important that Relatives of patients with borderline syndrome get help too.
Causes / who is to blame?
A borderline syndrome is a personality disorder that is caused by various factors. In order to better understand the patient, it is important for many relatives to know how borderline syndrome came about and what the causes are. It is important to know that the cause has not been clarified with certainty and thus one assumes various factors that could contribute to the development of a borderline syndrome. Still hits Relatives not to blame in the illness and the relative should not be held responsible for the fact that his child, sibling or parent suffers from borderline syndrome.
An important factor is that genetic component. It is considered relatively certain that children whose parents were emotionally unstable show some instability in their emotional behavior. However, it is difficult to say whether this was learned or genetically inherited, but it is believed that there is a genetic component to it. Some psychoanalysts, however, claim that the Environmental influences it is crucial that a child develops borderline syndrome. If sexual abuse or other assaults or acts of violence occur in childhood, this can lead to the child developing a borderline syndrome. That is why it is important after that traumatic events the relatives and their children attend adequate therapy to prevent the child from developing borderline syndrome. Most patients with borderline syndrome come from chaotic and unstable family relationships or off negligent family relationships.
Therefore it is important for the relatives to try to develop a stable family life in order to counteract the development of a borderline syndrome. In no way does this mean that a loved one is to blame if the child develops borderline syndrome just because the loved one is divorced or sometimes leads a somewhat chaotic life. Above all, it is important to have an emotionally stable level that is conveyed through love and care for one another. However, there are also children who seem to come from happy families and still develop borderline syndrome, which then seems very difficult for the relatives because they do not know what causes the mental illness. It is therefore important that relatives do not assign themselves to blame or point a finger at others and seek the blame on others.
Symptoms -> What is borderline and how to deal with it.
In order to be able to understand a patient with borderline syndrome as a relative, one should know roughly what is going on in the patient and how he is feeling. Of course, one cannot relate to every action the patient has taken, but if a family member has a rough idea of what borderline syndrome means for the person affected, they can be much more compassionate (more empathic) deal with the patient and understand that as a relative of a borderline patient one is sometimes powerless.
Patients with borderline syndrome usually have very low self-esteem and perceive their own selves to be very distorted. This can lead to the fact that they hurt themselves or that in the next moment they have a completely exaggerated picture of their own self. These identity disorders are often difficult to endure for relatives of borderline patients, especially if the patient does something to himself, for example scratching his forearm or thigh with small cuts. Also sudden strong aggression or strong fears can unsettle relatives and lead to their ability to show less and less understanding for the patient with the Bordeline disorder. Since many patients first develop these symptoms during puberty, it is often difficult for parents to distinguish what can be dismissed as puberty and from when professional help should be sought.
As a relative of a borderline patient, it is important to deal with the symptoms openly and respectfully. The borderline syndrome is a mental illness that needs just as much action as, for example, high blood pressure. However, it is important to know that, unlike with high blood pressure, for example, no complete cure for borderline syndrome gives. Nevertheless, patients can learn to live with the disease and get a grip on it to such an extent that it is not difficult for relatives to live with a patient with borderline syndrome. Nevertheless, as a patient and family member, one should remind oneself that the treatment of borderline syndrome does not heal with just a few tablets, but that it is one lengthy process acts, the patient and relatives demand a lot of strength. It is therefore always important to communicate openly with one another and, above all, the relatives should remember that they too have needs and can be overwhelmed with certain situations. Here it helps a lot if the relatives of the patient with a borderline syndrome also seek psychological or psychiatric help.
What can you do as a relative?
As a relative of a patient with borderline syndrome, one often has the feeling that one can only stand by helplessly. Many situations overwhelm you and you are afraid that the patient will not become "normal" again. As a relative, it is therefore important to seek help. The best thing here is the help of a psychologist because he is in the Talk therapy is well trained and can give important advice. Also Self-help groups or forums can be very helpful.
It is just as important, however, that not to forget your own life and to think about yourself for once. A relative who always supports the patient with borderline syndrome and is always there to take care of everything is an optimal help neither for itself nor for the patient. It is also extremely important not to react hysterically or in panic to the patient, even if the patient scratches himself. Here it is important to act very rationally and only send the patient to a doctor who will treat the wounds. The psychiatrist should then analyze with the patient exactly how it could have come to this, but that is not the responsibility of the family member. It is important for the relatives to always stay calm and not panic, even if this is difficult. At the same time, the patient's symptoms should also be taken seriously. No later than when a Patient repeatedly deep cuts or the like adds or even from Suicidal thoughts reported, the help of a psychiatrist should urgently be sought in a hospital on a ward where the patient is treated and monitored for an extended period of time. Here it can also help, as a relative, to accompany the patient in a few conversations, as this enables the problem to be better understood.
It is also important to know that there is repeatedly to worsening symptoms, so-called Relapse, comes. It is important not to relate the patient's behavior to himself. Rather, the relatives of a patient with bordeline syndrome have to make themselves aware again and again that aggression or exaggerated fears are part of the disease and one should try as a relatives to understand these emotions of the patient and not to rationalize them.
Nevertheless, as a relative, you should also be able to allow negative emotions and admit that sometimes you just don't know what to do next. Here it is important that you gain some distance yourself. Every patient is responsible for himself, this applies especially to mental illnesses. The relatives must know that they cannot save the patient with borderline syndrome, only the patient can do that himself. At the same time one should try to accept the differences of the other. As a relative, one cannot understand what is going on in the patient with Bordeline Syndrome and that is difficult to accept at first.
However, it is important not to apply your own rational standards, but rather to accept that every person is different and determines for himself how he wants to shape his life.
