Learning Problems-The-

ADD and family

Synonyms in a broader sense

Hyperkinetic Syndrome (HKS), Psycho-Organic Syndrome (POS), Attention Deficit Disorder, Attention Deficit Disorder, Fidget Philipp Syndrome, Fidget Philipp, Hyperactivity Disorder, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, ADHD, Fidgety Phil, behavioral disorder with attention and concentration disorders, minimal brain syndrome, Attention-Deficit-Hyperactivity-Disorder (ADHD), Attention-Deficit-Disorder (ADD).

description

The presentation of typical ADD symptoms already shows that the behavior and the resulting consequences can sometimes be a heavy burden for parents and the whole family. On the other hand, parents and other family members can also offer the ADD child specific help.

ADD - children need a therapy tailored to them, which can consist of different components. A diagnosis of ADD should never lead to “finally finding the cause” for many problems; you should never accept behavior “just like that”.
Especially when an attention deficit has been diagnosed, you should deal intensively with the different forms of therapy and work out an individual, multimodal therapy concept together with the treating doctor. Multimodal does not have to be equated with “very many” therapies. Multimodal rather requires a good, individual fit. However, individual, multimodal therapy always means: Support from the family must be available!
If drug therapy is necessary, the support is, for example, that it must be ensured that drugs are taken on time and continuously.
If psychotherapeutic or curative forms of therapy are considered, the fundamental, newly learned content must be repeatedly discussed with the treating therapist. As a rule, newly learned contents require domestic implementation, practice and consolidation.
Here it also becomes clear that not only the child, but also their parents must have a relationship of trust with the treating doctor, psychologist, therapist, etc. Implementation can only work if there is trust as a basis.

Family accumulation

As already described under causes of ADD, a familial accumulation can be determined in some families. According to the discussion: “Who was there first: the hen or the egg?”, Two controversial opinions formed. For example, some hold upbringing responsible for the problem, while others only accepted the genetic point of view as an explanatory model for themselves.

Problems from wrong parenting
or
wrong upbringing because of the problems?

Today we know that in the case of a clearly diagnosed ADD, upbringing cannot be recognized as the only cause. In spite of everything, education plays an important role in the case of ADD - and in the case of therapy it even plays a major role.

Family therapy

As a form of psychotherapeutic treatment, the Family therapy in ADD therapy. It implies the involvement of the entire family of an ADD child and in a certain way ensures that adequate management of the syndrome also in the home environment. Family therapy can also be advisable if the side effects of ADD place too much strain on the family. The goal of family therapy is to To pick up on ingrained behavior patterns and, if necessary, to redesign themso that an improvement in family relationships, so one Improving relationships with one another can be achieved.

The changes in behavior and relationship patterns, which are aimed at in the context of family therapy, mainly affect the patient positive for the general condition out. The point here is not to treat the actual causes, but to treat the accompanying symptoms in the sense of a holistic therapy in order to give the patient the greatest possible chance to step out of the vicious circle. The aim is to improve intra-family, interpersonal relationships Calm, structure and clarity into the overall situation and thus into everyday life. This structure is important for children who suffer from an attention deficit, as it is only through being structured that they get the chance to process everything piece by piece and in sequence. Overstimulation and excessive stress are completely out of place.

Parents and ADD

In order - as has been mentioned many times - to be called the “coach” of an ADD child, the actual problems (of the child) must be analyzed and assessed. In addition, since every problem as such is individual and it is certainly not only done with domestic support, on the one hand every therapy must be individually designed. For this reason, individual parental measures cannot be listed here. Below are some tips on parental management of ADD.

Critical assessment of the situation

Since the child's behavior should be observed over a period of about six months and help is to be provided to ensure that ADD is only diagnosed if the child repeats the corresponding behavior over a certain period (about six months) and in several areas of life makes noticeable. Therefore, first of all, ask yourself the following questions:

Which situations trigger my child's behavior?
Are there things that I rate positively about my child?
Are there actually clear rules at home? Do I really pay attention to compliance with the same?

There is primarily a personal assessment of the situation and an analysis of all stress-triggering factors. The first steps can be taken together with a counseling center and / or together with the treating doctor.
"Instructions" are developed that define which rules apply and which measures are to be taken.

NOTE:

Parents have to cooperate with the therapy and are jointly responsible for its success.
Formulate clear and understandable rules that are discussed with the child and aim to improve and change the behavior shown.
Praise and support your child whenever possible!
Assume the cooperation of all involved in the upbringing as a goal to avoid childish confusion in the sense of: "hmmm, there I can do what I can't ..."

Promotion in the home environment

It would be too easy and therefore it quickly makes sense: A therapy cannot start with a therapist and / or regulate itself by taking pills. Together with other measures, these measures form the cornerstones, the scaffolding, so to speak. The home environment and the measures taken there to facilitate dealing with ADD are an essential part of the (co-) design of the therapy, whereby the parents and their support of the ADD child in the home environment are assigned a very important task.
Since this task can also be very difficult - this is what affected parents almost always tell - the family situation is very often heavily stressed. To prevent this from happening (so quickly), there are various institutions that provide parents with advice and assistance.

Read more on this topic: Educational assistance - what is it?

Parenting behavior

Primarily, no other rules apply to the upbringing of attention-deficient children than to the general upbringing of children. These include:

Making the rules.
The clear and consistent compliance with rules.
praise
love
Affection
time

In the following, a few more comments on the upbringing of children in general, regardless of whether there is an attention deficit or not:

Not everything that a child would like to have must be given to them!
A clear, specific approach enables the child to understand what it is about.
Changing behavior on the part of the adults, including: disagreement in the parenting style of the parents, confuses the child. Sooner or later it will know how to take advantage of this!
Let your child do everything they can do by themselves. Don't do the job for him! Help only if help is needed. A child grows with such tasks.
Little woes and squints do not require special attention. Do not pay too much attention to such little things, otherwise every “little thing” becomes a big drama!
Honestly give praise. Your child grows with praise, but it must be meant honestly and not be done with every little thing. It then becomes worthless.
Criticize when criticism is appropriate. Make sure you use a nice tone. NOT: “How does that look like !!! You can do that better! "BUT:" Look, here you can maybe do it better by ... "
Try to answer questions honestly and sincerely. Explain wherever explanations are required.
Time can sometimes be short, depending on the parents' job and the number of siblings. Regardless, it always depends on how effectively you learn to use time. Your child will have no benefit from you if they watch TV during the time you have time for the child. A game together, a story read aloud, a cuddle together, etc. reflects time well spent. Then it doesn't matter if there is less time. Your child will then know that you love them and that you enjoy spending time with your child too.
You learn by making mistakes! Allow your child to be allowed to make mistakes, help with “big” problems and help them to get out of “messes”.
Get excuses from your child if they haven't done the right thing. If you have been unjust, this also applies to you!
Do not try to clear up mistakes, wrong behavior, etc. in a “superintendent” manner. Rather, explain why you are disappointed and what you would have preferred instead of this behavior.
Do not allow freaks at all. Turn away if your child “shoots” and rants against you on an emotional level. It is hard for a child to be left standing in such an extreme situation. Nevertheless: let it work itself out. It's better to talk with a cool head!

Educational advice

In principle, parenting advice can always be used when parents notice that they can no longer cope with their problems on their own and therefore simply do not know what to do next. Due to the current legal situation, advice at such institutions is currently free of charge due to the parental legal right to parenting advice. This can be read in the appropriate place in the Child and Youth Welfare Act.

As already mentioned, parenting advice centers can always be consulted when parents are “at the end of their game” and - in whatever respect - don't know how to go about parenting. As a result, the educational counseling centers usually have to cover a very broad field in order to provide parents with competent advice and assistance.

It may also be necessary to go to educational counseling centers for children with ADD, and in most cases this is very advisable. Counseling is usually based on an initial discussion, during which observations, the problem itself and any causal assumptions are discussed. Please always be honest and don't sugarcoat anything. If you and your family are to be helped, this is usually only possible if sufficient and specific information is provided. Don't be afraid that confidential information will be leaked out. Educational counselors are bound to secrecy. An exchange with other institutions involved in bringing up the children is only possible if you agree. But always remember - especially when you look at the various therapy options: A therapy can only be really successful if EVERYONE involved in the upbringing pulls together, the therapy is therefore “multi-pronged” (multiconditional, multimodal) .

Depending on the underlying problem, a detailed diagnosis can prove to be important or indispensable after the initial consultation. In addition to the classic test procedures, this also includes psychological examinations. But always remember: These are just individual building blocks that are put together to “build” a holistic therapy. The diagnosis as such is ultimately made by the treating pediatrician.

In general, it should be mentioned in conclusion that almost all areas are covered by an educational counseling center or contact point. As a rule, they are offered by charitable organizations (workers' welfare, youth welfare office, Caritas association, ...).